Changing the Subject…More Thoughts from the Fountain

Apparently the fountain in front of my office has morphed into a cool, teen-age hangout. I don’t know if this is because these youth identify closely with the homeless regulars, but their unkemptness appears intentional at this point. Watching these young people has led me to a couple of conclusions:

1) The U.S. needs to institute forced labor camps for idle teens. (Teen idols would also be well served by such a program.) If they have the time to lounge around the edge of the fountain and go for a soak and a smoke when they think no one is watching, they have time to make license plates, pick up liter along the freeways, and other life skills commensurate with their life choices.

2) If young people wear their belts around their thighs and old people wear their belts around their arm pits, I really must be middle-aged.

3) Trouble is not a destination; it’s where people end-up when they have no real destination in mind.

4) If the term “Dress for Success” has a corollary, it’s “Fashion of Failure.” In this case, it refers to the self-selected sample of youth that are drawn to public access fountains designed for the homeless to use for clothes washing and the odd, elderly couple to wade in while strolling the streets of Salt Lake City in bathing suits. Based solely on their "Fashion of Failure," I see a future as customers of a Cincinnati Sweet ‘N’ Eats and as contestants on a rehab-based reality TV show. Who knows they may eventually rise to the level of fry cook, but only until the photos of their after-hours hot tub parties in the fry cooker start circulating on You-Tube.

Indeed, these youths have been, um, something else.