Apple to Apples

The other day, we invited two other families over for dinner. Afterward, we decided to play a game of Apples to Apples. For those of you who are not familiar with this game, Apples to Apples consists of two sets of “apple” cards: green ones (adjectives) and red ones (nouns). Each round one player turns over a green adjective card and the other players chose the red noun card from their hand that, in their opinion, best matches the adjective. I like this game because with the right players, wit and humor are rewarded. With the wrong players, well, never mind. So we began the game with six adults… After the first two rounds, two eight-year-old girls and an illiterate five year-old girl entered the room and in giddy, squeaky voices said, nearly in unison, “I love Apples to Apples, can I play?” Seeing as only two of the girls belonged to me, I started to say, “of course not; you won’t understand half the words and at least one of you will cry if you don’t win.” But I quickly realized how ungracious it would be so I shortened my sentence to, “Of course.” And then there were nine.

Now you may be wondering, 'how do you play with a five year-old who can’t read?' Well, as long as she is the only illiterate player, then she selects a random card and places it in the pile. If no one else claims the winning card, then it must be hers. You would think that six college educated adults and two semi-literate elementary school kids would have no problem beating a randomly selected card by an illiterate five-year-old, but you would be wrong. More on that later.

One round after the girls joined, three eleven year-old boys entered the room, which ultimately made us an even dozen. That’s a lot of apples, nouns, and adjectives.

The game quickly devolved like this:

Eight year-old girl #1, reading through the nouns to determine which she thought best matched her adjective: “Princess D.I., there’s a D.I. princess?!”

Parent: “That’s Princess Di.”

Eight year-old girl #2: “Princess Die? Did she die or something?”

Another parent: “As a matter of fact she did…”

Eight year-old girl #2, interrupting: “Then shouldn’t it be Princess Dead, not Die?”

Another parent, continuing: “Di is short for Diana”

The adjective was irrelevant; the D.I. Princess card won.

The eleven year-olds also changed the dynamics. What adjective aptly describes a Giant Squid, a School Cafeteria, and Chickens? These were the finalists according to one 11-year-old for the word, glitzy. The next 11 year-old had to select a noun to match “honorable,” and determined Charging Rhinos to be the most honorable. Cleaning Bathrooms, Picking Your Nose, Vomit, the nouns were obvious, even if their connection to the adjective at hand was not.

So now back to our five year-old. You might be tempted to believe that it was the randomness of her selections that appealed to the younger players, but it turns out her selections appealed to the more rational thinking. For example, the adjective was “spooky,” the chosen selection? Darth Vader. Everyone was surprised to discover that the card belonged to the five year-old that couldn’t read.

When the clock struck eight, and we ended the game, the five year-old had won three times. I had only won twice. Several adults hadn’t won a single round. The wit and humor had to be reward enough.